PLEASE do not underestimate the info in the video below. It explains the neurological and chemical process that causes us to bond with an abusive and toxic partner. This is REAL and you need to know about this. I went through a horrendous traumatic ordeal at the hands of my ex narc-elder. When you trust someone who is in a position of ‘spiritual authority’ you don’t expect to be manipulated through gas-lighting and other narc methods; as a result trauma bonding can ensue. At a later date, I hope to provide some insights into my traumatic abuse by my ex narc-elder and how it almost destroyed me. Thank God that Jesus is alive and in control!
Those who have never been in an abusive relationship struggle to understand how people remain in one for so long. If somebody was mistreating you, “why did you stick around?” they ask. [Why did you go back?]
For survivors, this can be a really tough question to answer. The lucky ones escape, and stumble upon articles or books that give them the terms to be able to understand what happened to them, and thus describe their experience. Other times, though, this doesn’t happen, and people might not even be aware they were in a relationship that could be classed as “abusive.” This is because we are conditioned to believe abuse is always physical. On TV and in films, we see characters who are obviously evil. They are violent to their partners, shout at them aggressively, or even murder them in a fit of rage. While this does happen, it’s not a true representation of the abuse many others experience.