The escape phase is usually triggered by a major event in the group (i.e., something immoral or non-scriptural) that pricks your conscience so much that you realize you must have an exit strategy.
Here’s some steps on escaping… more details will follow.
- Start developing an exit strategy, quietly. Do not tell the NARC or any in the group. Whatever you plan, write it down so you can execute it effectiviely.
- At the same time as step #1, reach out to someone on the outside; contact NARC Recovery [ubmrecovery] @ [gmail] [dot] [com], there are many folks here to help. We can help you create an escape plan based on our experiences.
- *IF you are NOT married to the narc, you have to cut off ALL communications with the narc and his/her minions during this phase. If you do not they will try to ‘hoover’ you to seduce you back into group. You need to talk with those who have left – we are here to help you. We have been what you’ve going through. Again, it’s important not to communicate AT ALL with the narc or anyone still in the group. You need to get your support from folks that will allow you to vent and not judge you and give you sound wisdom based on experience. This is important.
- CEASE & DESIST ORDER: Often you will need to officially let the NARC know that you do not want them to contact you. You need to send an official email and/or text specifying that this is their formal notice to NOT contact you via email, text, telephone or in-person. IF they do not respect this order, the are breaking FEDERAL harassment laws and you can turn the into the authorities.
- More to come…
- Here some helpful links:
[How We Can Be Manipulated…]
As part of escaping, its important to understand the cycle of abuse. This video gives a good introduction into this process.